February 2020 - I was under the care of a midwifery team. My decisions were very much respected, particularly my choice to pursue hypnobirthing. While at the hospital my midwife and partner served as my advocates when I was too focused to speak for myself. This was necessary as the nurse supervisor came in several times and stated that she did not feel I was “far enough along” and that things needed to be “sped up” (this was untrue - at the time I was 7 cm dilated but did not appear to be from the outside because I was quiet, calm, and entirely focused on my breath).
My labour and delivery were very long because my baby was in an OP position but my experience was still extremely positive because of the autonomy and respect that I was given. My midwives were so gentle and consenting with me. I feel that if they and my partner had not been there, or if I had not worked so hard prior to my birth to make it the way that I wanted, that my story could have turned out very differently. Interestingly, at one point during my labour, the nurse (a young L&D nurse who was lovely) asked if she could bring in a nursing student very briefly because “she has only seen very traumatic labours and births and it would be nice for her to see one that is so peaceful”. I was happy to give this nurse that experience but it saddens me to think that a peaceful and calm birth is not considered the norm.
I’m very proud of my birth story because of how respected and powerful I felt. Other friends of mine were not so fortunate and it has reverberated on their mental health considerably. Because of my birth experience, I feel as though there is nothing I cannot conquer - it was so empowering because of the approach I used, the support that I had, and the advocacy that was given to me. I provided positive feedback to my midwives.
My advice: plan and practice for the birth that you want!! Make sure you are extremely comfortable with your care provider and make it clear what your preferences are (but have a back up plan). I strongly recommend taking a hypnobirthing course - it was a life changer for me, truly.
Submitted by Maciel Pereda
