August 17, 2015 - My OB was Dr Crumley at LHSC. She was a friendly Dr but my appointments felt rushed. I would wait upwards of two hours for my booked appointment. The nurse was abrasive and seemed quite passive aggressive about my weight gain. Comments like “hum I see you are up 5lbs from last week”. Never once in all my appointments, speaking to Dr Crumley, the nurses, resident Dr’s, did I feel like a complete human being. I left every appointment feeling like a vessel for my baby. I felt so disconnected from. I did not feel like a women in a changing body, growing a tiny human. Late in my pregnancy Dr Crumley began checking my cervix in the appointments. It was not optional and quite uncomfortable. I felt very violated after each check even though she was friendly I hated it.
My water broke at home 10am on August 16th. My husband and I arrived at the hospital around 11am and I was admitted right away. I immediately told the staff I would like the minimum amount of staff in the room while I was in labor. My nurse had been with the hospital for quite some time and was given permission to do my cervical exams to limit the number of Dr’s coming in and out. I was Strep B positive and was put on an IV with the antibiotics right away. This was not optional. I was very uncomfortable with the idea of being on an IV and my opinions did not matter.
The staff allowed me to go get a lunch at the cafeteria because I would not be allowed to eat until after the baby was born.
After l was allowed to walk around to see if the contractions would begin on their own. My waters kept breaking and I was given only one heavy flow maxi pad and one adult diaper (or mesh undies I can’t remember which). I was leaking all over and felt like I had peed my pants. But I was told I would only be provided with one maxi pad.
Contractions did not begin so I was told I would be induced. I did not want to be put on oxytocin but was not given any options. I was induced and strapped to many monitors.
Active labor did not being until late in the evening. My nurse on duty was pressuring me to have an epidural even though I did not want one. My husband had left to get some food and a coffee. The contractions were terrible and I was humming and moaning to get through them. I was throwing up and the nurse kept snipping at me to stop humming because I was sucking in air making me throw up.
Eventually the nurse pressured me to try morphine because I did not want an epidural. Unfortunately morphine does not work for me and I was confined to the bed for over an hour in extreme pain without being able to move.
As soon as the morphine wore off I was in such pain I asked for an epidural. The nurse made a comment I should have just got one right away. Only after I received the epidural did another nurse tell me my natural contractions were going back to back with contractions from the oxytocin essentially giving me a 3-5min long contraction without a break. I was also experiencing back labor.
Around 10am August 17 I was woken up and told it was time for me to start pushing. At this point my wishes for minimal staff to be present were not respected. Initially the attending Dr and two resident Dr’s in the room. I don’t recall being introduced to the resident Drs. My daughter was sunny side up and the Dr’s began to try to turn her. Within half an hour three Dr’s had been gloved up and had a turn trying to turn the baby. At around 1 pm I was told the baby had to come out soon or I would need a C-section. I was told I had an hour.
I was moved to an OR where I would have to birth my daughter on an operating table. I was told they would need to use forceps to turn the baby. My husband (not me) was informed I would be given an episiotomy. He hardly had a chance to say a word before he looked and saw the Dr cut me. They were able to turn my daughter and she was born at 2:05pm. I was not allowed immediate skin to skin as I requested. She was whisked off to be weighed and was handed back cleaned off and wrapped in a towel.
That evening I was unable to walk due to the epidural. At 9pm a nurse came and told me it was time for the baby’s bath. I was not given the option to help. She took my baby and began bathing her. My daughter was crying out and I was unable to go to her and calm her down. I had to sit and watch a stranger manhandle my newborn.
When I was finally able to get up and walk to the washroom I was tired. When I stood my leg buckled and I reached out for the nurse. She jerked out of the way and sternly told me not to grab on to her, the she had already injured her back helping a patient. Thankfully I was able to grab the IV stand and got my balance with it.
The next day I was able to see the lactation consultant. I had been in the hospital for 48hours. She was the first and only staff member who made me feel seen and the only staff member I felt safe with. She was amazing.
I was allowed to go home August 18 in the evening.
I hated the entire birthing experience. When my family came for a visit I started to cry uncontrollably. I did not have clarity at the time that I had experienced such a traumatic event.
I live close to the hospital and pass by it often. For months after I would break down just driving past it. Now looking back I believe I had a mild form of PTSD. Neither my OB or family Dr asked about the impact of the birth on me.
My pelvic floor is was shot and I have a prolapsed bladder. The episiotomy left me with stitches. Once healed my labia do not line up properly. Any menstrual liquid or discharge leaks right out. If I have a minor bladder leak it comes right now.
I did not know I had the option of providing feedback. This option was never given to me.
To me, Obstetric Justice would be informed decisions about every step of pregnancy labor and after brith. It would be taking a moment in every interaction to look the women in the eyes and acknowledging she is a unique person deserving of care based on her individual wants and needs.
I would love to have options be made available around the immediate use of antibiotics for Strep B and the immediate induction when waters break.
At teaching hospitals the option should be given to not have resident Dr’s participating in your care.
To the lactation consultant I would love to say thank you for being the only person to acknowledge me as a person not a patient.
Submitted by Mom now
